...force me to stay and the further i'll run.

LET ME FUCKING GO AND I'LL FUCKING COME BACK TO YOU, GOD DAMN IT.

If i eventually take my own life and run away somewhere you cant find, please be happy for me, for i've finally found what i've been searching for.

And my dreams will be protected forever, and ever.

...and got a HUMONGOUS oh-ba-kak on my forehead that's causing me a headache.

Had my first windsurfing lesson today. Barely got through a metre in the water without smashing into the water.

I got hit by what you call a "mast" of the "rig" or "sail" in laymen's term.

Apparently people who got hit by the "mast" suffered from major cuts that required stitches.

I'm.Freaking.Lucky.

It just makes me feel like shit.

You konw, after all these accidents, i've actually derived the best way to die--accidentally. It's all so fast, you have no time to think. Or be afraid at the blood that's gonna gush out. It's just a concussion, a shock, a faint, and you bleed to death unconsciously.

Maybe all these are signs. Signs that I'm gonna get into a REAL accident that's gonna cause my death. I'm just waiting.

Sitting, waiting, wishing.

Wishing for my dreams to be protected. Forever.

...and the fucking driver didnt bother to stop and get off his precious vehicle.

Fine, i admit, i was j-walking. But i wasnt a willing victim. My boss was rushing. K, it's an excuse.

We were crossing the road, illegally, and we heard a fierce motorbike approaching. We both turned left, and when we turned right, a car smashed into me.

I flipped onto the front part of the vehicle, did a spin, and landed on the floor. Or rather, i broke the fall with my left hand, hence the puny little cut.

The vehicle drove off.

Passerbys (passerbies? passer-bys?) stared. I got off the road and onto the pavement.

My boss was freaked.

I was like, "what just happened?". "It felt quite exciting!" And I was just giggly and laughing, when my boss was...shocked. Hah.

It was actually quite a good feeling. Though I really dont know why. I just felt...like a movie star? I felt...something good.

I'm lucky.

I just got a pretty alright small little cut on my left wrist, and a speck of blood on my left foot, with an aching shoulder.

I'm fucking lucky.

I'm so lucky, I think I'm really unlucky. I really should have died. Really. But the thought of my boss witnessing my death is a bit cruel...and that damn-able bespectacled driver.





I really just cant appreciate life anymore...