I look to my eskimo friend...when....The world came crashing down on me. I just know it. I have always been an eyesore to those above. And this is my retribution.
Am feeling like an oversized bird in a pathetically puny cage.
Imagine my wings sticking out of the cage,
face pressed against the cold metal bars,
and my butt being decorated with vertical stripes.
How ironic.
If i had $20000, i would buy a giraffe.
well, maybe.
If i didnt make it to VJ Arts, i might have stayed at YJ...playing touch rugby and floorball, and acting as the clown in Antony and Cleopatra.
Just watched Mr. Deeds on HBO starring Adam Sandler.
I aspire to be the "Executive Producer" and Lead Actress in a movie.
But more importantly, i've realised what i am not exactly extremely comfortable with in VJ...namely, VJC arts faculty.
This may sound cheesy. But it's a piece of my mind. (cue: laugh)
I think i've lost my innocence. (yes i hear you)
No but seriously, "Mr. Deeds" said this in the movie....
kk..before that, i want you to think of your childhood dream.
Like mine is: To be an actress in hollywood (yes yes...i HEAR you)
ok?
Now...he said that every progression in life, we tend to make a compromise.
One compromise after another.
And at the end of the day, you found that you are FAR FAR away from your dreams.
We tend to start thinking with our wallets instead of our hearts (k.this doesnt really match with my dream..but you get the idea)
Watching Mr Deeds...a guy who has absolutely no material wants at all.
He is innocent, fun-loving and
kind.
He grew up in a small little puny town away from the cities.
When he went to New York, he became THE subject for humiliation. People laughed at him and his ignorance. Laughed at his childish but honest poems. But one thing for sure, that didnt affect him. Neither did he "stoop" to their level. Nor use those people's "ironic humour" to get around. He just marvelled at the simplest things in life...such as echos. He was a communist in many ways.
And he lived such an amazing life. A life i desire. (yes yes it's the movies. just bear with me OK??)
anyway, that made me think twice about literature...the arts...
How we're so caught up with....everything and the MEANING behind it.
How we forget the simplest things in life. and i mean SIMPLEST.
How we lampoon and satirize everything (is there such a word?? heh)
When what's most important and what really matters is...
human relationship and understanding.
Perhaps i'm not very good at expressing myself. Just keep my point of view in mind and go watch Mr. Deeds. you'll understand. The movie makes it a point to exaggerate both parties so it becomes very clear.
Anyway, it's times like this when i wished i didnt come into VJC arts faculty. Perhaps the science fac will let me continue my "innocence" from secondary school. Or ignorance if you like it.
But...i'd just like to say...
If i have $20000, i would buy a giraffe.
I find pens really interesting. How it allows you to write down things you wish to say in physical form. Simply magical -- the simplest things of life.
And i might even consider going to a university in the country side...and not in the bustling city.
And i will continue to be a nice and kind girl. No matter what you say. Yes you, you know i'm referring to you.
And i belive in
you, i really do... and i really hope you're reading this.
marvelling...
vanessa
