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all the love i ever had

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were shared together

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awak budak cantik kena cium bantat apek

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just had the urge to do that since i gradually find it unsafe to type what i want here. all those were typed while i was thinking of what i really wanted to write.

feel it.

God damn Good Friday


The Blower's Daughter

current obsession: erm... tsd?
current song: Damien Rice...the theme song for Closer.

men.
are screwing up my life.

in this short span of one week, 3 have affected me--greatly.

and i feel like killing them.

wish they never existed.

wish i could live the life i want to.

"..the reason women have breasts,..is so that men will talk to them." (my favourite line from my monologue by Terry Johnson.)

grow up and let go.

current obsession: the movies Moulin Rouge and Closer (of which i'll comment on soon..)
current songs: moulin rouge soundtrack

i want to make singapore part of The World Of Mime Theatre, and be a professional mimer.
(but i do want to act on top of that. i cant possibly keep silent all my life. impossible.
and i want to produce my own piece of theatre for public viewing, and possibly world performance. hah. i'm really dreaming.)

i want to be a Discovery channel Travel and Living host. (it's absolutely cool and u get to see, learn, touch, EAT so so much!! it'll be utterly life fufilling!)

voulez-vous coucher avec moi, ce soir.

current obsession: miming and losing weight. sigh
current song: emimen's Mocking Bird and definitely still jLo's Get Right

beefour
before
bforebisaye
bifoar
biefor
biiiphore
b4

yes. that's my chinese results.
disappointed? definitely.
accepted? definitely.
retaking? doubt.

(oh god i really cannot stand your face when you show off whatever you do and take pride in)

viv says nene has cellulite.
viv says it wasnt so bad last time.
guess i've really grown fatter. if i dont watch it, i'll hit a MASSIVE 55kg soon. oh for god's sake, NENE STOP EATING!!!! (all irony intended)

missed dance class today
took bus late
didnt know where to stop
overshot stop
got lost
missed class
got 1 demerit point
wondered around finding buses
went esplanade to get charlie chaplin videos and mime books
left wallet AND handphone on shelf
totally forgot about it
lucky i wanted to borrow my stuff and i realised they're missing
run back to shelf
gone
run to counter
there it is.
thank god
(or rather, the person who returned it to the counter)
took 56 home cos didnt want to walk to mrt
took 45mins
and another 15mins to walk home
decided to make my day better
wanted to buy gold hoop earrings from j8 that are only $2.80
but i only had $1.50 on me
times like this i wished i had money to take cab and money to calm myself down.
nets would be really cool
reached home to spill orange juice all over me *exaggerated*
and face the fact that i have showing tmr morning at 830 with NOTHING done
absolutely nothing
2 weeks
twoweeks
tuuuuweeeecsss
to my prelims
am screwed
mime training is NOT easy can definitely not be completed in just 2 fucking weeks
face is rotting
pimples invading my face ever since group
and hasnt subsided
this must be the worst pimple outbreak i ever had
and the most stubborn
bot new cream and facial wash for acne
didnt work
want new clothes and shoes to dance in
but no money
want time to fix my blardy phone
no time
want to buy my crystal navel stud
no money either
wanna watch closer,a very long engagement,a series of unfortunate events,million dollar baby,ray,aviator
no money no time no company
i have been rambling so if u r still reading
well done
you are the world's most patient person
and i congratualate u
but all that i've just said
are lies
all but the previous sentence. (hopes i'm making sense)

if u didnt get it,i mean everything is true except the line "but all that i've just said are lies"
geddit?geddit?geddit?

k. basically, i've finished blogging, and i'm back to tsd.

nene stop eating.

current obsession: dancing. (in b/g i go: shake shake shake to my luuuu~~~)
current song: Jennifer Lopez's Get Right (it's nice k. dont gimme that face. *wipes it off*)


Under Repair
a cut and you see blood.
a stab and you see blood.
a slash and you see-
hell.
blood bond---
broken.

a short...erm...stanza of words written in less than a minute, but contains a hell lot of feelings that accumulated over a looonnggg period of time. argh. it's so hard to articulate. sometimes i think people use poems to cover up what they really mean so that people wont find out. it's a way of expressing yourself yet hide what you wanna say. HAH. anyway, i like the title. hoho. (btw, i'm kinda Vobsessed with the words "blood bond". love the B..B.. lovely. aahaha)

nothing much to say...

cept for the same ole stuff that i'm bombarded with homework. hah. what's new. well, this time, on top of hmk, i have my TSD A level prelims to do. argh. am directionless. am mugging plato now in hope of inspiration. sometimes i wonder why didnt i just do acting. but i'm happy with myself that i'm still perservering. i dont really care if i screw up my mime cos i still have my group piece to back me up a little. am lucky. but it shall not be a reason for me to slack my arse off.

plato oh plato.

anyway, some quotes to share:
"Eternity is the keyboard of a piano, and Time is the hand that strikes the notes." -James Dunne

"In the halt between stations, the mental emptiness deepens."-T.S. Eliot

"Why is growing up a decline? Is this part of nature's plan, this slow slipping down toward the grave?" -(forgot who)

(and yes Farah, if u're reading this, i did use my handphone to take down these little quotes from a library book. ahaha.)


world peace,
vane